Tuesday, June 19, 2007

CHRISTIAN ONE LINERS

Here are some one-liners that have been around but thought I'd post them today. Have a wonderful summer day.


DON'T LET YOUR WORRIES GET THE BEST OF YOU; REMEMBER, MOSES STARTED OUT AS A BASKET CASE.

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MANY FOLKS WANT TO SERVE GOD, BUT ONLY AS ADVISERS.

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IT IS EASIER TO PREACH TEN SERMONS THAN IT IS TO LIVE ONE.

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THE GOOD LORD DIDN'T CREATE ANYTHING WITHOUT A PURPOSE,
BUT MOSQUITOES COME CLOSE.

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PEOPLE ARE FUNNY; THEY WANT THE FRONT OF THE BUS,
THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD, AND THE BACK OF THE CHURCH

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OPPORTUNITY MAY KNOCK ONCE,
BUT TEMPTATION BANGS ON YOUR FRONT DOOR FOREVER.

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QUIT GRIPING ABOUT YOUR CHURCH;
IF IT WAS PERFECT, YOU COULDN'T BELONG.

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SOME MINDS ARE LIKE CONCRETE...
THROUGHLY MIXED UP AND PERMANENTLY SET.

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PEACE STARTS WITH A SMILE.

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I DON'T KNOW WHY SOME PEOPLE CHANGE CHURCHES;
WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE WHICH ONE YOU STAY
HOME FROM ?!

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WE ARE CALLED TO BE WITNESSES,
NOT LAWYERS OR JUDGES.

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BE YE FISHERS OF MEN.
YOU CATCH THEM - HE'LL CLEAN THEM.

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DON'T PUT A QUESTION MARK WHERE GOD PUTS A PERIOD.

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FORBIDDEN FRUITS CREATE MANY JAMS.

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GOD DOESN'T CALL THE QUALIFIED, HE QUALIFIES THE CALLED.

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GOD GRADES ON THE CROSS, NOT THE CURVE.

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GOD LOVES EVERYONE BUT PROBABLY PREFERS
"FRUITS OF THE SPIRIT" OVER "RELIGIOUS NUTS!"

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GOD PROMISES A SAFE LANDING, NOT A CALM PASSAGE.

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HE WHO ANGERS YOU, CONTROLS YOU!

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IF GOD IS YOUR CO-PILOT - SWAP SEATS!

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PRAYER:
DON'T GIVE GOD INSTRUCTIONS -- JUST REPORT FOR DUTY!

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THE TASK AHEAD OF US IS NEVER AS
GREAT AS THE POWER BEHIND US.

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THE WILL OF GOD NEVER TAKES YOU
WHERE THE GRACE OF GOD WILL NOT PROTECT YOU.

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WE DON'T CHANGE THE MESSAGE,
THE MESSAGE CHANGES US.

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YOU CAN TELL HOW BIG A PERSON IS
BY WHAT IT TAKES TO.....DISCOURAGE HIM.

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THE BEST MATHEMATICAL EQUATION I HAVE EVER SEEN:
1 CROSS + 3 NAILS = 4 GIVEN.

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38 comments:

Kristie said...

"IF GOD IS YOURU CO PILOT SWITCH SEATS" I love this one and how true so hard to give up control isn't it?

Tina said...

I love the one about not griping about your church!! THat was great Susan, thanks.

Our Peculiar Life said...

aaah YOU CAN TELL HOW BIG A PERSON ISBY WHAT IT TAKES TO.....DISCOURAGE HIM. This is the one that hits me today. :-) Thanks for posting these, Susan!

Tina said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Trella said...

I love these, and I have not seen most of them. Thanks for sharing.

Trella

diana said...

all of these are great. but i love the one that states that God probably prefers "fruits of the spirit" over "religious nuts." =)

Karen said...

I've seen some of these before, but the one that stands out today to me is the one about mosquitoes. I agree!

Susan said...

Great post, Susan! You really are a wealth of information and quips. I love visiting here for that reason.

Hugs to you!!

:-) Susan

inspired said...

great ;o] absolutely ;o]

Frazzled Farm Wife said...

"He who angers you, controls you", I need to learn from that.

They were great Susan, I had not heard all of them. Thanks for sharing them with us.

Barbara said...

These are great and so true. Some I have heard before and some are new to me.

Just Mom said...

Great one liners!

Love this one; "The will of God never takes you where the grace of God will not protect you."

I got a chuckle out of "I don't know why some people change churches; what difference does it make which one you stay home from?" Sadly, I know people who fit this.

annie said...

IT IS EASIER TO PREACH TEN SERMONS THAN IT IS TO LIVE ONE.
I learned that one the hard way!

these are great Susan! thanks for posting them.

♥♥♥♥
annie

Kitty said...

These were ALL great, Susan!! Thank you so much for compiling them and sharing them. My favorite one is..."THE WILL OF GOD NEVER TAKES YOUWHERE THE GRACE OF GOD WILL NOT PROTECT YOU."

Kitty said...

Oh yeah, and peace starts with a smile. How much nicer things are in my house when I simply smile at everyone when they look at me!! =)

Ruth said...

I love the one about God doesn't call the qualified but qualifies the called!

Pearls of Wisdom said...

Dear Susan.

Love these they are great.


Hugs,

Angel ():)

Diane said...

I love these! And how true they each are! Thanks for sharing these. I may have to bookmark this post...it is worth revisiting!

Diane

jennifer said...

I was constantly reading thinking oh that is my favorite, but they all are great.

I give you 100% on the interest and delight.
Thank you so much
Jennifer sends ((hugs)) too

PEA said...

I had heard of some of them but not all...they truly do all make sense! lol I so enjoyed reading these!! xox

~Ginger said...

Great Susan! I had not heard MANY of these. Good for the brain.

Love it when you share this stuff :)

Nanette said...

Great quotes. I saw your comments on adoptedashisown blog and tagged you for 8 Random Facts about yourself. Hope you don't mind.

Maxine said...

These are sooo funny. I really like the one about people changing churches. That one about mosquitoes is one I've said over and again.
Thanks for giving us a chuckle. I for one needed it tonight.

Kitty said...

Hi Susan, I was trying to email you back but Yahoo is acting up and I can't send out. But I wanted to let you know that all is well. I pray you have a safe and wonderful trip to Nova Scotia, and I am looking forward to pictures and hearing all about it when you get back!!! =)

Saija said...

good ones! :o)

Nadine said...

Those were great. Thanks for sharing them.

Pam said...

I loved this one and think I know a few of these folks! LOL
"MANY FOLKS WANT TO SERVE GOD, BUT ONLY AS ADVISERS."
These were all great Susan. I had heard most of them before but they still made me chuckle and even made me analyze myself to see if I fit into any of them!

Rebecca said...

Thick in the midst of jam-making, I liked the one about Forbidden fruit getting you into lots of jams!

These were fun!

Lori B said...

Those are all great Christian One Liners.
Thanks for sharing them with us.

Maalie said...

Ha! Brilliant and witty :-)

And there's a few I actually agree with ;-)

Beetle said...

Sorry that i just have a chance to stop by after something necessary keep me busy...I love all the liners and thank you so much for sharing it,Susan!

and i think world will be in harmony and peace if "IT IS EASIER TO PREACH TEN SERMONS THAN IT IS TO LIVE ONE"...people do the opposite of this one line.

Christy said...

I LOVE THOSE!!!

The comments about churches are my favorite. Thank you!! I am going to share those with Clay.

AdoptedAsHisOwn said...

LOVE'EM! i posted some on my blog.....hope you don't mind!!

Lyndy said...

Oh too cute. I had seen some of these but not all of them.

Thanks for sharing Susan.

Kelli said...

Those are great, Susan!!!


Kelli

Myrna said...

Witty group of quotes!
I like the one about the will and grace of God. So true!

CONNIE'S THOUGHTS FROM THE HEART said...

Those were great. Some made me laugh out loud some made me thankful.Thanks for posting them . connie from Texas

Mary Lee said...

Loved the one liners! I am at work and LOL...getting stange looks from fellow employees!!