Saturday, October 24, 2009

TO LOVE IS TO LISTEN


"The Greatest Of These Is Love" 1 Corinthians 13:13


Stephen Sample says, "The average person suffers from three delusions: that he's a good driver, that he has a good sense of humor, and that he's a good listener. You may succeed in life without the first two, but you won't without the third." Are you a good listener? Do you think what you have to say is more important than what's being said to you? When people talk, do they get the impression you're not listening? If so, write, "LL" on a card, carry it with you and look at it regularly. It means, Listen, and Look at people while you're listening. One study says we hear 1/2 of what's being said, listen to 1/2 of what we hear, understand 1/2 of that, believe 1/2 of that, and remember only 1/2 of that. Translate that into an eight hour work day and it means you spend about four hours listening, hear two hours worth of what's said, listen to an hour of it, understand thirty minutes of it, believe only fifteen minutes worth, and remember less than eight minutes - of all that was said in eight hours. Wow, it sounds like we all need to work at listening!

You cannot "connect" with someone if they don't feel heard and understood. A deaf ear is the first symptom of a closed mind, if you haven't formed the habit of listening - you aren't going to get the facts you need. And when you don't have all the facts, you're in the dark. Paul writes: "The greatest of these is love." One of the greatest expressions of love - is a commitment to listen?

Taken from The WORD For You TODAY

Do you think you are a good listener? How does this apply to us here in blog land? I'd love to hear your thoughts and comments on this.




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10 comments:

Mari said...

I like to think I'm a good listener, but too often I find myself thinking of a response while listening. The statistics you listed are worse than I would have imagined though!

Mary said...

Oooohhh, what a good post! I accuse my hubby of not listening to me, but no doubt, I'm guilty, too. It should be no wonder that communication is suffering in the world today...when I watch Fox news, and listen to both "sides" talking over each other, there's no way either of them are listening to the other's view point. Yes, it a characteristic of love to listen...it means that you are "thinking of others as better than yourself" rather than "puffing yourself up in your own mind".

God bless,
Mary

Shirley said...

Thanks for this good reminder, Susan. I know I can improve on my listening skills - especially where my dear children are concerned.

Vaxcel said...

Thanks for the reminder that we need to be for others and not just be heard.

Dan said...

I once heard of a study that suggested that the single most common identifier for one's enjoyment of another person in a social system had nothing to do with socioeconomic station, as too many suppose, but rather the amount at which the talking vs. listening was shared evenly. You can't listen if someone has nothing to say, and you can't talk if someone else never stops. Good listening is an art form.

Maxine said...

I'm afraid I just got my feet stepped on. I think I'm guilty. I think those stats could be applied to me. I really needed to hear them though, because I need to improve my ways in this area. Thanks for bringing it up.

Kathy said...

I would say I am a good listener. As a person is sharing I like to say that I listen with my ears AND my heart, if that makes sense. I try to hear what God is saying in a given situation...that's just how I do it. As a blogger, I often will pray in how to reply. I think that's a form of listening. Now for a true report, ask my children and my husband. : ) I know I have loads to learn however...so thankful for the patience of those around me that I fail as a listener.

Sandra said...

Remember what I said the other night at bible study......when Susan talks, we listen!!!!!!!
That's because we respect and love you.

I think I'm a fairly good listener unless it is someone who talks all the time, then I tune out about half of what they say. I try to avoid people who want to do all the talking.

retha said...

True

~Ginger said...

Wow, powerful! I think I'm a good listener as well. I get very frustrated when I'm talking and someone blows me off. I know I talk a lot, but it's very rude to watch someone turn their eyes away or break in with their opinion even before I finish a thought. It makes me work harder at listening to others.

I'm printing this off and taking it to work. We need to listen to patients and this is a wonderful reminder to really use both ears!